Transparency

The cost of transparency is enormous. It could end up costing you everything. It can cut you to the core of your existence. It will bring you to your knees, but hopefully you find yourself at the feet of the one who created you... and there you find the love that paid for what your best efforts could never buy.

There is no worst feeling than the one you feel when all of your junk goes public. The dark secrets you don't want anyone to know... or the secrets you try and keep from the ones who you know will be hurt the worst. There is a deep gasp that your stomach feels as your sins are laid bare in front of the people you have toiled to look like Superman in front of. There is nakedness that you suddenly feel... there is nothing to hide behind, no more lies to tell, no way to"spin" things so you don't look as bad... everything is on the table. There is no where to go, so you look into the eyes of the people you have hurt.

You run the risk of loosing close friends and those you love when your junk is laid bare at their feet. The way they look at you is changed... maybe it gets a lot clearer, because now they see more of you than you ever let them. What are they going to do with all this new information about you. What are they going to think about the "you" that you are when no one else is around? Are they going to walk away and condemn you... to be honest, you deserve it; you lied, cheated, stole, and hurt...

Here's the thing, I have spent so much time and energy try to hide myself from those who care about me. I have tried to hide the worst parts of who I am, because sin causes shame and guilt. So, instead of dealing with the sin, I would rather spend years in the agonising guilt and shame of my repeated sin. Even as a believer, who knows the saving power of Jesus, I have spent years trying to hide the dark places of my soul. The author of Hebrews tells us that there is nothing unseen by the Lord... there goes that sinking feeling the pit of my stomach again. He knows every ounce of me and my sins, so why hide?

In the most direct way I know how to say this to any of those who read this: Get help! Don't try and fix yourself in the dark of the night. Only the Lord can change your heart. You worst sin is not to big for Him, and there is no sin worth holding on to. Alcohol, drugs, pornography, lust, lies, hurt... there is no sin worth repeating, and no sin that the Lord can't help you get away from. He will walk with you as you walk way from the dark places of your soul. It's a hard painful road to even get to the point of admitting that there is a sin...but the road to the cross held the pain and sorrow of all men, where would we be if Jesus hadn't taken the hard steps? So there might be people that walk out of your life when you come clean in front of them... it will hurt like hell. But Jesus knows that pain, and I promise that freedom is better than bondage.