In a attempt at honesty, I must confess a prayer of mine that I lift to the heavens:
"Lord, take me to a different place. Take me to snow capped mountains, where the pine trees' greens are covered by blankets of snow. I want to see my breath in front of me as I release the cold air from my lungs. Let me feel the freedom of looking down at the world from a high altitude. Lord, replace this concrete world I daily wake to with cool meadows of high grass, that bend with every wind you send. Show me flowers that I have never seen. Let me watch the leaves turn form green to red and yellow. Lord, take me to the base of the Red Wood's. Let me try and wrap my arms around their great trunks. Lord, let me swim under the great waterfalls tucked away in the rain forests I only read about. Let me play in a Portland rain storm. Let me stand beside the ocean and feel just how big you might be. Let me lay beneath a clear Montana sky and watch your stars wink at me. Take me to the fish of Alaska, I promise I will cook them with the reverence they deserve! Let me feel how tiny Rhode Island is, because I already know how big Texas is. Lord, take me any where, just take me away from the place you have me. I want to see the great beauty the world has, because I refuse to see the beauty in the city that I live."
I am a selfish man. I understand that there is nothing wrong with the passion I have in my heart. I believe God gave me the urge to explore and stand in awe of His creation. My selfishness lies in the allowing this passion to overshadow what he has for me here. He has placed me in this Metroplex, working at a coffee shop for a great reason... I just don't want to see this reason. I just want to see snow and different colored leaves, and I want to live in the ideals that I have of those places.
Just trying to find the strength to live in honesty.
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